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Top 21 Fear Of Abandonment Quotes

Fear Of Abandonment Quotes

This post contains some of the best fear of abandonment quotes.

What Is Fear Of Abandonment?

Fear of abandonment is a type of anxiety that can be caused by a past traumatic experience, such as a relationship ending abruptly, neglect or physical separation from a loved one.

It can also be caused by an insecure attachment style developed during childhood or other life events that impact our sense of security and trust in relationships.

People with a fear of abandonment often have an intense need for validation and reassurance from their partner, may become overly attached or clingy, and may feel anxious or distressed when separated from their loved ones.

This fear can lead to difficulty in forming healthy relationships, and may perpetuate a cycle of clingy behavior, anxiety, and relationship instability.

Therapy and other interventions can help individuals overcome this fear and develop more secure relationships.

Fear Of Abandonment Quotes

1. “When one is abandoned, one is left alone. This can happen through physical absence as well as physical presence. In fact to be abandoned by someone who is physically present is much more crazymaking. ” – John Bradshaw

2. “The fear of abandonment forced me to comply as a child, but I’m not forced to comply anymore. The key people in my life did reject me for telling the truth about my abuse, but I’m not alone. Even if the consequence for telling the truth is rejection from everyone I know, that’s not the same death threat that it was when I was a child. I’m a self-sufficient adult and abandonment no longer means the end of my life.” – Christina Enevoldsen

Fear Of Abandonment Quotes

3. “If you leave someone at least tell them why, because what’s more painful than being abandoned; is knowing you’re not worth an explanation.” – Unknown

4. “People don’t abandon people they love. They abandon people they were using.” – Unknown

5. “If a fear of abandonment is part of your story then it’s likely that you feel trapped by your fear and the accompanying thoughts and emotions. You may also feel trapped by your behavioral reaction cycle—the automatic behaviors that you engage in when you’re dealing with the n

egative thoughts and emotions that your fear of abandonment triggers.” – Michelle Skeen

6. “The stage was set for your fear of abandonment by factors outside of your control. The story about your fear of abandonment (and additional core beliefs) is the result of factors that were present at your birth (temperament) and factors that were present in your environment. These are conditions that you couldn’t control as a child.”- Michelle Skeen

7. “The link between fear of abandonment and early attachment is powerful. But it is possible that even a securely attached child can develop a fear of abandonment core belief.”- Michelle Skeen

8. “But when we look at the characteristics of the caregiver of the avoidantly attached child—rejecting and harsh—it doesn’t take much to make the connection to the core belief of abandonment, mistrust and abuse, emotional deprivation, defectiveness, and failure.”- Michelle Skeen

9. “It’s likely that you struggle with fear of abandonment without an additional diagnosis, even though you may experience feelings of anxiety, depression, and panic when your fear of abandonment gets triggered.”- Michelle Skeen

Related: Abandonment Issues Quiz: Do I Have Abandonment Issues?

10. “With an abandonment core belief your thoughts may include: People who love me will leave me or die. No one has ever been there for me. The people I’ve been closest to are unpredictable. In the end I will be alone.”- Michelle Skeen

11. “As someone who struggles with an abandonment core belief, when you experience the slightest hint of rejection you will have thoughts predicting loss and abandonment. You can’t stop these thoughts—none of us can stop our thoughts from constantly popping up.”- Michelle Skeen

12. “Practicing self-compassion means softening your heart and distancing yourself from your inner critic and the negative statements that reinforce your fear of abandonment and feelings of unworthiness and inadequacy.”- Michelle Skeen

13. “With an abandonment core belief you know that you are hyperaware of any whiff of withdrawal or rejection. It’s important for you to tolerate some behaviors that are acceptable but uncomfortable for you. You may need to do more watching and waiting than you like because behavior patterns emerge over time. You need time to figure out if the other person is consistently reliable or unpredictable.”- Michelle Skeen

14. “Abandonment is about loss of love itself, that crucial loss of connectedness. It often involves breakup, betrayal, aloneness—something people can experience all at once, or one after another over a period of months, or even years later as an aftershock.”- Susan Anderson

Related: Self-Abandonment: What Is It & How To Get Back In Touch With Yourself

15. “Abandonment means different things to different people. It is an extremely personal and individual experience. Sometimes it is lingering grief caused by old losses. Sometimes it is fear. Sometimes it can be an invisible barrier holding us back from forming relationships, from reaching our true potential. It can take the form of self-sabotage. We get caught up in patterns of abandonment.”-Susan Anderson

16. “Abandonment is our first fear. It is a primal fear—a fear universal to the human experience. As infants we lay screaming in our cribs, terrified that when our mothers left the room they were never coming back.”-Susan Anderson

17. “Sometimes you were the one initiating the breakup because you felt abandoned during the relationship. Or the abandonment was sudden and unexpected, in which case shock and disbelief took over.”-Susan Anderson

18. “Abandonment survivors are those who have experienced the anguish of lost love and have the courage to go on believing in life and in their own capacity for love.”-Susan Anderson

Fear Of Abandonment Quotes

19. “People struggling with the abandonment syndrome are plagued by insecurity and self-sabotage, yet many manage to lead productive, even stellar, lives in spite of it. Others find the chronic insecurity too disabling to fully express their talents.”-Susan Anderson

20. “Abandonment survivors are sensitive, caring, and primed for love. But membership to this venerable group is not restricted to those able to achieve success in their relationships. Many continue the struggle to resolve the old abandonment wounds that stand in the way of finding love.”-Susan Anderson

21. “Unresolved abandonment is the root of self-sabotage.” –Susan Anderson

Related: How To Heal Abandonment Issues? Top 15 Powerful Strategies For Fear of Abandonment Healing

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How To Overcome Fear Of Abandonment?

The fear of abandonment is a common and natural human emotion that arises from feelings of insecurity and vulnerability.

Here are some tips on how to overcome this fear:

1. Identify the source of your fear: Try to understand the reason behind your fear of abandonment. This could be due to past experiences, childhood trauma or current relationships.

2. Challenge negative beliefs: Often, our fear of abandonment is fueled by negative beliefs about ourselves and our worth. Challenge these beliefs and try to replace them with positive ones.

3. Practice self-love: Focus on yourself and engage in activities that make you feel good. Self-care practices like exercise, meditation, or spending time with people who care about you can help build your self-esteem.

4. Seek support: Surround yourself with supportive people who value and appreciate you. This will help boost your confidence and reduce feelings of fear and anxiety.

5. Seek professional help: If your fear of abandonment is impacting your daily life, consider seeking the help of a therapist or counselor. They can provide you with tools and strategies to manage your emotions and overcome your fear.


  • Portions of this article were adapted from the book Love Me, Don’t Leave Me, © 2014 by the Michelle Skeen. All rights reserved.
  • Portions of this article were adapted from the book The Journey from Abandonment to Healing, © 2014 by the Susan Anderson. All rights reserved.

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