In this post, you’re going to learn how to get rid of porn addiction.
Porn Addiction Test: Am I Addicted To Porn Quiz?
#1. Do you spend far more time watching pornography than you originally intended?
#2. Do you fail in your efforts to stop or limit your consumption of pornography?
#3. Do you experience enjoyment before and during watching porn followed by feelings of shame after?
#4. Do you become irritable or angry when you’re unable to watch pornography?
#5. Have you lost some of your ability to feel pleasure in things you once did (e.g. hobbies, exercise, work, certain activities, etc.)?
#6. Has consuming pornography interfered with or negatively affected your personal and professional life?
We will not sell your information. All results are kept confidential.
This quiz is for informational purposes only. It is not meant as a diagnostic or assessment tool.
Results
The questions above represent common signs of porn addiction. If you answered yes to most of these questions, then you may be addicted to pornography.
The Inner Conflict of Porn Addiction
If you are addicted to pornography, you are probably familiar with the internal conflict porn addiction can create:
- You want to stop/you don’t want to stop.
- You worry about the risks/you ignore the risks.
- Your addiction makes you feel bad/ Your addiction makes you feel great.
Many addicts find pornography pleasurable. They struggle to see it for what it is: deeply disturbing dehumanization and degradation of people for the pleasure of someone else.
However, some addicts may see pornography as repulsive and disturbing after acting out.
They may make great resolutions to never indulge again.
But eventually, reality hits and their resolve becomes less exciting as addicts go back to facing their pain again.
Related: How To Stop Bad Habits And Addictions?
Pornography Addiction: Is There Hope? Top 6 Tips On How to Get Rid of Porn Addiction
The following are some helpful tips to help you on your healing journey:
#1. Make The Distinction Between Yourself And Your Addiction
Picture your addiction as a selfish beast that you can starve and tame until it loses its control over you.
This beast doesn’t care about you. It doesn’t care about the risks. It only wants pleasure now.
#2. Use The Word “Never”
Many people use the approach “One day at a time” to shut up their addictive voice.
However, this approach makes no long-term promises and so your addiction is willing to wait.
A better way to respond to your addictive voice is to say something like, “I never use porn.” And repeat it to yourself each time you hear your addictive voice.
Related: How To Stop Living A Double Life? Top 8 Ways to End The Stress Of Leading A Secret Life
Why Quitting Porn Gradually Doesn’t Work?
Cutting down or a ’porn diet’ keeps the addiction alive in your mind.
This keeps you preoccupied, waiting for the next session to relieve withdrawal pangs.
Ironically, this makes sessions even more enjoyable and pleasurable.
The longer the period of abstinence, the more withdrawal pangs you suffer and the more enjoyable the sessions become.
In fact, the main difficulty in stopping isn’t the neurological addiction, but the lies you believe about the addiction.
#3. Challenge Your Addictive Beliefs
Your addiction can be creative when it comes to arguing why you should consume porn.
Thoughts such as “you can’t stop,” or, “you will use again,” or, “you won’t relax until you use,” are your addictive voice.
The key here is to recognize these thoughts as lies and to repeat again, “I never use porn.”
Over time, your addictive voice will diminish and will loosen its control over you.
To help you challenge your addictive beliefs, become more aware of the thoughts you’re having right before watching porn, write them down, and question their validity.
The following questions can help you reframe your addictive beliefs:
- “Does porn really fill a void? Or does it create one?”
- “Does porn actually make me feel good? Or does it leave me feeling worse?”
- “Would acting out really make my problem go away?”
- “Do I really believe this pain will never end?”
- “Would watching porn bring relief or would it add to my pain?”
- “Do I honestly believe that I can’t survive without porn?”
- “Do I really think there is no way to deal with stress in life other than watching pornography?”
- “Do I really need to go through life sabotaging my mind and body?”
Related: How To Change Negative Beliefs? The Ultimate Guide To Challenge Negative Core Beliefs
#4. Abstain From Using
Unless you abstain from medicating your pain with pornography, you won’t be able to address your issues and learn healthier ways to cope.
Get away from the source of pornography:
- Turn off the computer
- Turn off the TV
- Turn off the WiFi router
- Turn off your phone
- Etc.
Each time your addictive voice begins to turn your thoughts toward porn, distract yourself:
- Listen to music you love
- Cook your favorite meal
- Pray
- Talk to or text a friend
- Try volunteering
- Go for a walk in nature
Also, repeat to yourself, “I never use pron.”
#5. Find Healthier Ways To Manage Pain
Addiction happens when we make the choice to experience pleasure when things become uncomfortable.
No one wants to feel pain. But pain is not the problem.
Pain is feedback, telling you something about what’s going on inside and around you.
Sadness, for example, tells us that we lost something important to us, or were unable to get or achieve what we want. Acknowledging this can help us slow down to reflect and motivate us to make changes in life.
When we use addictions, we lose access to the wisdom of our emotions and allow the pain and discomfort to bottle up inside us.
Discomfort usually begins as a feeling of boredom, loneliness, or stress.
But if you allow yourself to sit down with the feeling, you may discover other deeper issues.
Healthier ways to cope with emotional pain may include:
- Mindfulness and meditation
- Journaling: write down your thoughts and feelings
- Talking to a safe person or a therapist
Related: How To Stop Replacing One Addiction With Another? Powerful 8-Step Guide To Emotional Sobriety
#6. Connect With Other People Through Service
Pornography can cause us to disconnect from and dehumanize other people and addiction, in general, can lead to self-centeredness.
For addicts, the “feel-good” chemicals generated by their addiction are much more intense than the gentle joy of kindness.
Acknowledge that even though service won’t bring the same excitement your addiction brings, it is still a good step in recovery.
Related: Best 50 Acts Of Kindness to Show Compassion to Others Every Day
Porn Addiction Online Accountability Partners
Support groups for porn and sex addicts can be a great place to find support and accountability. The following are support groups that offer online support:
If you’re not comfortable seeking an accountability partner, apps can help you hold yourself accountable.
Apps like Porn Addiction Calendar – Quit and Ever Accountable can help you hold yourself accountable.
Conclusion
The only thing that prevents us from quitting porn is fear that’s caused by our addictive beliefs.
We strongly believe that we won’t survive without porn, that the pain will last forever, that we can’t relax or find enjoyment if we don’t consume pornography.
Quitting porn takes courage to face and challenge the lies we keep feeding ourselves.
FAQ
Should You Disclose Your Addiction?
Disclosing your addiction can be helpful in holding yourself accountable.
But as the Sexaholics Anonymous White Book offers, you need to do so wisely:
“We suggest that newcomers to Sexaholics Anonymous not reveal their sexual past to a spouse or family member who does not already know of it, without careful consideration and a period of sexual sobriety, and even then, only after prior discussion with an SA sponsor or group. Typically, when we come into the program, we want to share our excitement with those closest to us and tell all right away. Such disclosures might injure our family or others and should be confined to the group of which we are a part until a wise course is indicated. Of course, if there is any chance we have put others in danger, we take immediate steps to try to correct that.
“Few things can so damage the possibility of healing in the family as a premature confession to spouse or family where sacred bonds and trust have been violated. Unwittingly, such confessions can be attempts on our part to dump our guilt, get back into good graces, or make just another show of willpower. Great caution is advised here.
“Amends to family must begin with a sexually sober, changed attitude and behavior on a daily basis. Then, as we grow in recovery, we will find how to make direct amends. Help from sponsor and group is indispensable here. There’s always a way, if we really want to make things right.” (“Sexaholics Anonymous” p. 3, 1989)
Resources
Support Groups
Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous (SLAA)
- www.slaafws.org
- 210-828-7900
Sex Addicts Anonymous (SAA)
- www.sexaa.org
- P.O. Box 70949
- Houston, TX 77270
- (713) 869-4902 or (800) 477-8191
Sexaholics Anonymous (SA)
- www.sa.org
- P.O. Box 3565
- Brentwood, TN 37024
- (615) 370-6062 or (866) 424-8777
Sexual Compulsives Anonymous (SCA)
- www.sca-recovery.org
- Old Chelsea Station, PO Box 1585
- New York, NY 10011
- (212) 439-1123 or (800) 977-HEAL
Codependents of Sex Addicts (COSA)
- www.cosa-recovery.org
- PO Box 14537
- Minneapolis MN 55414
- (763) 537-6904
S-ANON
- www.sanon.org
- P.O. Box 111242
- Nashville, TN 37222-1242
- (800) 210-8141 or (615) 833-3152
Recovering Couples Anonymous (RCA)
- www.recovering-couples.org
- P.O. Box 11029
- Oakland CA 94611
- (510) 663-2312
Alcoholics Anonymous (AA)
- www.aa.org
- P.O. Box 459,
- New York, NY 10163
- (212) 870-3400
References
- Portions of this article were adapted from the book Ten Keys to Breaking Porn Addiction, © 2007 by Anonymous. All rights reserved.
- [Basic addictive beliefs and craving] – PubMed (nih.gov)
- Online Porn Addiction: What We Know and What We Don’t—A Systematic Review – PMC (nih.gov)
- Neuroscience of Internet Pornography Addiction: A Review and Update – PMC (nih.gov)
- Is pornography addictive? (apa.org)
- What Are the Effects of Porn Addiction? (verywellmind.com)
- Frontiers | Compulsive Internet Pornography Use and Mental Health: A Cross-Sectional Study in a Sample of University Students in the United States | Psychology (frontiersin.org)
- Science Stopped Believing in Porn Addiction. You Should, Too | Psychology Today
- Can Pornography be Addictive? An fMRI Study of Men Seeking Treatment for Problematic Pornography Use | Neuropsychopharmacology (nature.com)
- Pornography Addiction: Why Pornography Is Addictive? (webmd.com)
