This post contains “Emotionally unavailable parents test” to help you assess any emotional neglect you’ve experienced as a child.
Who Are The Emotionally Unavailable Parents?
Emotionally unavailable parents lack the ability to be present or provide emotional reactions in the face of their child’s emotional needs.
For example, you may tell your mother about being teased in school. She can see your distress, yet offer no words or comfort. Instead, she goes back to making dinner as if nothing happened.
Related: Childhood Emotional Neglect Test
Emotionally Unavailable Parents Test
#1. Did your often parents lack the ability to “mirror” (i.e. reflect back the same emotional state you would experience)?
#2. Did you parents often respond to your emotions with indifference, dismissiveness, or impatience?
#3. Did your parent show no interest in your life (School work, friends, interests, etc.)?
#4. Were your parents unwilling or unable to provide comfort when you were in emotional distress?
#5. Did your parents usually avoid discussing or engage in any negative emotions?
#6. Did your parents have difficulty expressing their feelings?
We will not sell your information. All results are kept confidential.
This quiz is for informational purposes only. It is not meant as a diagnostic or assessment tool.
Results
The questions above represent common signs of emotionally unavailable parents. If you answered yes to most of these questions, then you might have been neglected emotionally by your parents.
Related: Healing From Childhood Emotional Neglect In 6 Steps (+FREE Worksheets PDF)
FREE Emotional Neglect Worksheets PDF
How to Heal From Emotionally Unavailable Parents?
If you grew up with emotionally unavailable parents, you probably find it difficult to name and manage your emotions, especially difficult ones.
The following steps can help you manage your emotions more effectively:
Step 1: Close your eyes. Focus all of your attention on your breathing, turning your attention inward.
Step 2: Ask yourself the question: “What am I feeling right now?”
Focus on your physical sensations (heaviness in the chest, headache, muscle tension, stomach pain, rapid breathing, dizziness, sweating palms, etc.) and try to identify the feeling that triggered this physical sensation.
Naming your feelings can sound like:
- “I feel upset,”
- “I am frustrated,”
- “I felt hurt when you said that.”
Related: How To Feel Your Feelings & Sit With Painful Emotions? (Top 9 Difficult Emotions)
Step 3: Try to figure out why you are feeling that way. Ask yourself: “Why would am I feeling ____ right now?”
If you find it difficult to figure out the reason behind your feelings, Use the following questions to further reflect on them:
- “What is going on in my life right now that might make me feel____”
- “Has something happened recently that could make me feel____”
- “Has something troubling from the past been brought back up by recent events?”
“Is this feeling familiar to me? Have I felt this____before? If so, what happened in the past that has triggered this feeling?”
Related: Top 21 Emotional Writing Prompts To Process Emotions
References
- How to Recognize an Emotionally Unavailable Parent I Psych Central
- How to Avoid The Trap of Present But Absent Parenting (amotherfarfromhome.com)
- Emotional availability: theory, research, and intervention – PMC (nih.gov)
